Friday, 29 June 2012

Kids, Why Do You Anger Me So?

'Why do ya hate kids, Zaineb? WHY? HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE THEIR INNOCENCE?' Because SHUT UP, that's why. No really, 'shut up' 'shut the fuck up' and an endless list of profanities is all that runs through my head when surrounded by kids. WHY DO YOU ANGER ME SOOOO?!?! I know this is gonna make me sound heartless, and evil, but let's be real, that is truly what I am.
To be honest, this whole thing has probably stemmed from watching T.V shows like Supernanny and all that other crap. Those shows have given me enough reason to hate all children that can speak with a passion. Don't get me wrong, (some) babies are cute..and even some kids! But as soon as they start speaking- HAVE MERCY ON ME. It's really hard to contain my anger around them, they just piss me off. It may be because I generally can't handle stupid beings, and to me, kids are soso stupid. No I don't mean in the sense of intelligence etc. etc. because ya can't expect a kid to know the world when they're young, but you know that moment when you have to small talk with a kid, and you have to dumb yourself down- I HATE THAT. I'M NOT STUPID, WHY DO I HAVE TO ACT IT? It really and truly pains me. And it shocks everyone when I say it, but I really can't help how I feel. 
I mean, one time I was with a couple of friends eating in a restaurant. A kid was sitting behind me making faces at my friends. They were obviously all saying 'awwwww she's so cute'... and what came out my mouth naturally and without any realisation???? Brace yourself people, I said to the child 'I want to kill you'. LOCK ME UP PEOPLE-WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME? I think its become some sorta mental illness and I HATE IT. KIDS HAVE ACTUALLY TURNED ME INTO AN EVEN MORE EVIL PERSON. In my defense, it's not me, IT'S THEM I TELL YOU! All the friggin' noise they make, all in tune with one another, like a symphony of annoying-ness, all at the goddamn same time. And their wining and crying and noise noise noise and irritating-please-shut-up-now! 
And the worst is the kids that lack any discipline and shout at their parents.  I witnessed a child call their mum a 'fat cow'...the mum just took it. I mean, I know nothing about parenting, but if that were me, I sure as hell would look that kid right in the eye sternly and ask them 'how does it feel to be the SON OF A FAT COW'? Argh. Kids. Don't worry peeps, before you fear for my future children, I assure you, those days are a longgggg way away. Oh and I would like to point out that my children will probably be amazing, 'cause I myself was obviously the cutest child....but even I can admit that changed as soon as I was able to speak, haha.

Eating the world from a young age

10 comments:

  1. LOL 'how does it feel to be the SON OF A FAT COW', so you

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  2. remember that child at your work experience, 'rush me' or something hahaha

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    1. loool what are you on about, jasbo?

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    2. hahaa wasn't it you who came across an annoying kid in nursery called something like 'rush me'? hm maybe not. also you need to chillllllll ya beanzz cos i bet you were the most annoying kid out there :)

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    3. looool nope not me! and i can assure you, I was shy/innocent/cute x

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  3. You are an absolute sociopath. You want to kill kids - you steal their food (your work experience at a nursery) - you make them cry (you've probly done that at least once) - and now death threats?!
    What happened to make you so bitter inside?! lol ^.^

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    1. having you as a sister is what happened.
      p.s. thanks for baiting me out with the whole stealing their food. I purposely left that experience out of this post loool

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    2. To be honest you probably learnt the whole food stealing thing from me. I used to steal your McDonalds when you turned your back to your food when we were kids - I bet you never turn your back on food now. Muhahaha

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  4. This is so funny, love you Zainey :) xxxxxx

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