Thursday, 30 August 2012

ARE YA HAIRY?

Today I thought I'd blog about something which not a lot of women like to talk about....FACIAL HAIR. I can see ya'll cringing right now behind your screens, but most of ya'll are probably werewolves, so pipe down!!! I really don't understand why the subject is such a taboo, seeing as the majority of girls I know have more hair than ya average girl (fuck the average girl!!!!!) Well enough of the embarrassment, I'm here to tell you all about a device I use for facial hair.

Firstly, if you're a guy reading this, and this has somewhat painted a horrendous image of me to you, then I'm glad, because you're probably horrendously shit yourself.

So here's a little background story, my 'hair story' so to speak. Seeing as I'm of Middle Eastern descent, I have unfortunately been cursed with hairiness. There, I can say it because I've had to accept it. Gone are the days where I constantly curse my parents for their genes (actually I still do curse my mother, that woman got the hair-free gene and couldn't pass it on :'( ). Sigh, I was the girl with the moustache and mono-brow at school (until I was old enough in my mother's eyes to get rid of it). I can say this without giving a fuck because all the people who did take the piss out of me were idiotic guys who were intimidated by the fact that I could grow more hair than them (why am I saying this proudly lmaooo) and who eventually fell in love with me due to my amazing personality (lol). I guess the upsides of being hairy is that you're blessed with thick eyebrows and thick hair (which although I find a nuisance, I know other people would kill for).



Here's a pic I think demonstrates best my freshly done eyebrows. I'm often asked if they are penciled in at all, they are not, I am hairy.

So yeah, I have tried every type of hair removal in the book.... Cold wax strips: Do not work. Hot wax: Makes me break out, so by the time my spots are gone I'm hairy again....Thread: Fuck my life. Having long eyelashes and thick eyebrows means I have possibly the most painful threading experience. The bitchass lady always seems to get my eyelashes caught on the thread. Sigh.  I surprisingly don't find doing my upper lip painful. I know most people find it unbearable, but for me, because of how often I have to do it (every bloomin' day) I'm just used to it. Getting it done everyday professionally isn't the kindest to my wallet, and I'm not the sorta person who wants to form a relationship with the lady at the salon, because I'm generally awkward like that. So I'd like to stay away from as much as I can.  
So, one day, many years ago, I stumbled across a product which has helped me a heck load with doing my upper lip.

Lolz, doesn't she look so relaxed

This thing my dear friends, is a blooming saviour for people who cannot be bothered to learn how to thread, and people who constantly have to do their upper lip. I know for a fact my upper lip is too sensitive to be waxed (try walking into high school countless times with a scab on your upper lip, sigh), so this is AMAZING.

Here's the instructions for those wondering how the heck you use it: 


THIS SHIT HAS CHANGED MY HAIRY LIFE. It's saved me a lot of money, and is so handy because I can carry it around anywhere with me. It does look a bit dodgy, and if someone found it laying in your handbag, they will probably wonder what the actual fuck? But if this happens, you slap them across the face for even looking in yo handbag!

I can't remember how much I got it for, I think £10 or something along that line.. Pretty inexppensive for what you are getting! The website is www.eze-tweeze.com, so if you're interested you know where to go.

Overall, it is pretty easy to get to grips with. Pain wise, it stings a bit, but you get used to it. That being said, as I said before, my pain threshold on my upper lip seems to be different to other people. Either way, with patience your upper lip will be hairless in minutes. You can use this on other parts of your face, but for me, I can't stomach the pain...It's all down to you and what you can handle.







And there are my manly hands to add to the image of my general manliness.

So that's my upper lip sorted, as for the rest of my goddamn face, I use this sometimes, but I already swear enough, and using this on my face just makes me swear all the more. As does using anything on my face... But that is my own personal battle that I have to live with forever...sigh!

Anyways, I hope I helped some of you girls out there...and I hope you can all join me in a prayer for the hairy girls, 'cause we need all the love we can get- LIFE IS HARD BEING US!!!

P.s. totally tempted to take this out at a dinner party and just started rolling it around across my face like its something casual LOL. What dinner parties do I even go to? I forgot who I am for a second there.

KNOW YOURSELF PEOPLE

and on that note... CIAO



7 comments:

  1. This post is literally my life summarised!, it's so true you get blessed with thick hair and thick shaped eyebrows but then you have to worry about your upper lip or your side burns or basically anything that's growing out of your face! Grrr the perils of being middle eastern!, as always love ya zainyyyy

    From the love of your life <3

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hahaaaa I use that!! It's so much more easier than threading or waxing! Ohh the torture we have to go through!! xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ahh a lot of people don't even know of its existence! yeh i know its such an annoyance x

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