Wednesday, 22 August 2012
Food and No Words
This is food I consumed today. Usually I would go on about how amazing it all was, and how I suffered the world's largest sugar comma, but not today. I'm just gonna cut to the chase and say it; I'm pretty shaken up. No, nobody died, something worse happened.... A bird shat on my arm. I actually have no words. If you know me, then you'd know just how much I am terrified of birds, so to have the thing you fear probably most in the world take a goddamn shit on your arm is not the best feeling. I think it was their revenge because earlier today in East London (home of the Asians) I saw a bunch of them eating jalebi, or as us Arabs call it, zalabiya, and I found the situation all so typical for East London. Such freshie pigeons. So yes, I laughed GODDAMNIT I LAUGHED HARD. BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAD TO SHIT ON ME YOU EVIL PIGEONS :'(. God, it had such perfect aim. I know it's meant to be good luck if a bird shits on you, so something flipping amazing better happen to make up for this. Until then, if you need me, I'll be in the corner of my room rocking back and forth from the memory of it all.